What is it about the term LIFE COACHING,

What is it about the term LIFE COACHING, coaching or business coaching that provokes such a strong reaction of negativity from people.

I was at a networking event last week and the word LIFE COACHING came up…I was a little bit taken aback as coaching was been referred to as a pyramid scheme!

Some people say that people are just jumping on the band wagon and they don’t have any life experience! A massive assumption who knows what life experience someone has, only the individual I would have thought!

Oh then when you do have the life experience you’re told you’re only doing it because you’re messed up! or you have some deep seated problem that you haven’t yet resolved.

Is coaching really about life experience?

Oh they are not qualified but when they are qualified there told that qualification isn’t everything.

So why do the words LIFE COACHING, coaching or business coaches provoke such strong reaction of negativity from people?

How often do you celebrate business success…

Thank you for taking the time to press the button on my business success poll.

All additional comments welcome below…

Wendy

Modern day networking from the comfort of my seat…..

I started out on Twitter as many people do by randomly following people who share similar interest. Over time this has changed and I’m now following fellow Tweeters who add value by providing me with useful information and links not only relevant to my community but also in building my business.

Over the last week I’ve….

• Been asked to introduce fellow Tweeters together so there relationship can be started.
• Connected two businesses together with the potential for business to be passed.
• Promoted a local business event.
• Promoted my own event.

• Provided informal education.
• Had fellow Tweeters thank me for introducing them to one another at a Tweetup.
• Connected with new Tweeters .
• Learnt more about the community I live in.
• Going to an event this afternoon  I heard about on Twitter.
• Sent an American reporter a link to a blog post which is about how coaches use Twitter this has now become a story of interest and has the potential to be published.
• I’ve arranged a face to face meeting.

What do you use Twitter for?

Success in five easy steps

Are you recognising Success in Your Business & Personal life?

Just take a couple of seconds to think about how you measure success ?

Success is a relatively new concept for me I’ve always thought of success as something other people have not me.  In the past I didn’t really recognise or celebrate success, I wasn’t known for celebrating birthdays or Christmas and to be honest I still find it difficult.

In the past I would have measured success by maybe acknowledging the end of a journey. If you take a qualification for example rather than celebrating each module along the way. I would wait a couple years until I’d finished the course then celebrate my achievement.

Rather a large gap from beginning to end: concentrating on the stressful and thinking I’m more likely to fail and not recognising the small….and large nuggets of achievement along the way.

Knowing what I know now this seems rather ridiculous!

So what’s changed?

How have I learnt to create five simple steps to achieve greater success in my business and personal life? There have been two major tipping points over the last eight months.

Firstly – I’ve been meeting regularly with a fellow coach.

We meet to celebrate the successes we’ve had in the previous month, no matter how small. We talk through the successes we’ve had and raise a glass and celebrate. We have a giggle and set new targets for the coming month.

Secondly – Toastmasters has taught me to break achievement down. As the toastmasters process clearly recognises each task you take on as a success step on your journey to achieving a bigger goal.

Each role you take on is recognised as an achievement and supported by having your success step signed off by a fellow member of the group. Also as a group we celebrate the success of individual standing up and giving a speech to the audience.

I am now measuring success by recognising and acknowledging success in smaller steps.  No longer do I measure an end result. Give it a go, it’s much more enjoyable!

How YOU can achieve greater….

Are you up for a new challenge?  it won’t cost you anything and has the potential to be life changing.

By applying these simple guidelines……

Step one – STOP  – Find a quite space – I don’t care where it is you could be sitting quietly in your car or in the corner shop it doesn’t matter as long as you STOP.

Step two- Take five minutes out!

Step three – Very quickly brainstorm in your mind the success you have had during the week.

Now if you are finding it difficult to identify something just think about a small step. It could be something as simple as writing a letter. You’re not looking for something major you’re looking for a step in a process as part of your journey.

Step four – Pick one success

Step five – Enjoy the moment, recognise your achievement, get in the flow, have a smile on your face and celebrate your success.

I recently gave this talk at the Brighton and Hove Speakers Club, Lotus Loan-Thu’ Nguyen was so inspired I was mentioned in her blog Deep Connection!

Networking created by Wendy Kier

I’ve just joined my local BNI www.bni-brighton.co.uk to be honest I was very sceptical before attending the meeting as I had all sorts of stories and thought that there was no way this was going to be for me. However I was very surprised by the level of energy, enthusiasm & support within the group.

Surely when you join any group you would go out of your way to form business relationships by taking the time to understand the individual’s service to be able to make recommendations

Network meetings are not just about securing referrals they are also about developing relationships, mentoring, confidence & credibility it’s not a quick fix & takes time to develop.

Is your inner “self talk” doing you any favours – created by Wendy Kier

When you are looking to make a change in your personal life it’s important that you have a level of understanding of your inner voice “self talk”.

We all have an internal dialogue which reinforces whether we are going to succeed or not.

If you’re telling yourself that you can do it, you really want it, it will improve your quality of life, you can actively make the changes, you believe in yourself and your self esteem is high then your journey is made much easier.

If on the other hand you have low self esteem and are saying to yourself, I cannot do this, I am hopeless you are more likely to fall at the first hurdle your journey will be more difficult and you are less likely to succeed.

This does not mean you will not be able to make the changes you need or want to make.

We naturally look for evidence to support the way we feel so if we don’t succeed we tell ourselves “I am stupid” which reinforces our low self esteem and even keep people around use who will reinforce this view.

If on the other hand we succeed and have high self esteem we just reinforce the way we feel about ourselves and surround ourselves with like mined people

It took me a long time to realise that I had the power to change the way I perceived myself from having very low self esteem to learning to value myself.

This means you can to….

Emotions created by Wendy Kier

Sure this is a difficult one there are so many variables to take into consideration, we have so much going on in our lives that our energy gets zapped. From the fast food we choose to eat the demands placed on us by work and the dynamics of the games that get played out. Our relationship with our families doing things that we don’t really want to be doing and losing our sense of self. Our relationships with our partners friends and children all pull us in different directions.

On top of all of this we have our life experiences good or bad that we start seeing the world through which shape our interactions with others.

Life has become very complicated giving us little time to really think about what we are doing and where we are going. Our emotional needs become fuzzy and we start reacting from a muddy perspective. The good news is things can change  ” we are not who we were yesterday today is a new day“

The wheel of life created by Wendy Kier

Make a note of all the key areas in your life

Highlight the 8 key areas which are currently the most important to you

Draw an image similar to the one above,1 – indicates less satisfied, 10  – indicates totally satisfied

Transfer each of your 8 headings into an individual piece of the pizza

take a look at your first heading and think about how satisfied you are in this area of your life, is there room for improvement, do you want to do something differently or are things just as you want them to be.

When you’ve reached a decision draw a line in each segment which represents how satisfied you currently are

Take time to reflect

• What have you noticed that you were not aware of before?
• What have you learnt from undertaking this exercise?
• What is causing you concerns?
• Which one area of your life are you the most content with?
• Which one area of your life do you need to focus on?

SMART goal setting created by Wendy Kier

SMART Goal setting

A popular framework used within coaching is called SMART goal setting. This process will enable you to create a clear goal that is achievable.

For goals to be achievable using the SMART framework they need to be:

S	Specific
M	Measurable
A	Attainable
R	Relevant
T	Time-bound

It might be useful to firstly break each heading down by brainstorming your ideas.

S	Specific	clear and well defined
M	Measurable	dates and times
A	Attainable	is it possible, achieve
R	Relevant	is it what you really want to be doing
T	Time-bound	set a deadline

After brainstorming your ideas you will need to produce a sentence that incorporates the key elements you have identified within the SMART framework

Examples

“Over the next three weeks I will have identified & implemented sustainable changes in my life style which contribute towards my fitness & wait management”

“In three weeks time I will have discovered my niche for the next three years”

“I will have lost 6 pounds of unwanted fat in the next six weeks”

“I am” instead of “I will”

Phrase your goals in the present tense

The subconscious is unable to distinguish between the truth & a lie or between positive & negative. It accepts whatever you put into it & moves you towards achievement. Goals need to be framed in present tense “I’ am” which works towards reprogramming the mind & leaves the subconscious to work towards whatever you put in it.

Check your goal out

Ask a friend what they understand from the goal you have written down. If they give you vague answers then you know you will need to do a little more work.

Five reasons why goals fail

1, you haven’t considered the impact your decisions are having on other people around you. So they may not  be in agreement or even aware of your plans….

2, you’ve set a goal that is too big and haven’t looked at breaking it down so it becomes unmanageable……

3, Your doing it for somebody else not yourself….

4, you’re working towards your goal, and hit a barrier your sense of self is preventing you from moving forward. Your own level off fear and self limiting beliefs are coursing you to self sabotage….

5, Listening to other people around you telling you!  you cannot do it…

A little trick I use before public speaking – created by Wendy Kier

A little trick I use for public speaking

I sing an element of my speech to myself at home and on the way to the event. This may sound a bit strange as I am a terrible singer. What this does is it allows my voice to go through different pitches high & low. My voice sounds strange and I have to learn to breathe differently and apply more control over my voice and the way I breathe.

This really helps when I’m standing in front of a group of people and feel the nerves take over. I don’t get so freaked out and can control my breathing and tone of voice as I am more used to hearing it sound unnatural.

Give it a go and let me know how you get on

The Complaints Fast’! created by Wendy Kier

Are you up for a personal challenge?

The Complaints Fast’!

If you choose to play, for the next 7 days you are not allowed to complain about ANYTHING to ANYONE. Complaining is the opposite of creating.

That’s not to say you can’t think of a complaint but if you complain out loud, even the tiniest little complaint, about the tiniest little thing, you have to start the 7 days again!

It’s not easy!

Do you want to play?

Reply yes or no and let the game commence!!

Confidence tip created by Wendy Kier

What a difference a smile makes..

Gives us greater confidence & attracts people to us

Brings happiness, reduces stress & changes our mood

Makes us more attractive & look younger

Boosts your immune & reduces your blood pressure

Be more positive, strengthens relationships & helps defuse conflict

Goal setting fantasy or a figment of your imagination created by Wendy Kier

It’s one thing writing a goal down but if you don’t have it in your mind’s eye and connect with it then it’s likely that you will never achieve it…..

Wright your goal down and keep it close

Take some action and make the time to read it

Take yourself forward in time and visualise yourself in the future

What are you thinking/feeling that lets you know you have achieved your goal

What do you see happening?

What 1 action are you working on that will take you one step closer to achieving  your desired outcome.

There’s a natural energy created when we start working towards achieving our goals.

The road may be bumpy at times as the journey is not always that easy. Unless we have the energy to move froward and see the bigger picture we can become resistant to change and our goals become just a fantasy or figment of our imagination.

What drives you?

Effective goal setting includes Identifying what is important to you, what motivates and drives you. What would you not be prepared to let go of or even compromise on.

What are your core values?

The below exercise will enable you to start thinking about what is really important to you.

You will need a pen and paper for note taking…

Step 1

What have been your three most fulfilling accomplishments in life so fare?

What were you doing?

What personal feelings were driving and motivating you

What aspects do you enjoy the least in your work/life?

What were you doing?

What feelings where de- motivating you

What is the opposite of the feelings that were de-motivating you?

Not having a voice – having a voice / not been creative – been creative

Step 2

List the most important arrears of your life right now?

Work/career – Family/friends – Health – Fun/leisure – Environment

Under each heading list what is really important to you.

Step 3

Under each heading highlight the one aspect you feel the strongest about? Which one aspect would you not be prepared to give up?

Your values may include…

Honesty -Strong connection with family – Regular exercise – Equality – Spiritual growth

When your values, beliefs and goals are in alignment not only does your motivation increase but also your confidence and self esteem. This will enable you to make better decisions and live life with integrity.

Coaching you on your business

Experience the 5 minute coach Wendy Kier coaching you on your business leading you to greater success…

• Each recording is no longer than 5 minutes.

• Click on each relevant  title to download an MP3 or play through windows media player.

I would advise getting a pen and a piece of paper handy to make notes….

Coaching you on your business

If you have any questions please don’t hesitate to contact me direct

Wendy

Wendy@bb-life-coaching.co.uk

Take a helicopter view of your business

Experience the 5 minute coach Wendy Kier coaching you on your business leading you to greater success…

• Each recording is no longer than 5 minutes.

• Click on each relevant  title to download an MP3 or play through windows media player.

I would advise getting a pen and a piece of paper handy to make notes….

Take a helicopter view of your business…

If you have any questions please don’t hesitate to contact me direct…

Wendy

Wendy@bb-life-coaching.co.uk

Create a “vision” a Flash-forward of your business

Experience the 5 minute coach Wendy Kier coaching you on your business leading you to greater success…

• Each recording is no longer than 5 minutes.

• Click on each relevant  title to download an MP3 or play through windows media player.

I would advise getting a pen and a piece of paper handy to make notes….

Create a “vison” a Flashforward of your business

If you have any questions please don’t hesitate to contact me direct

Wendy

Wendy@bb-life-coaching.co.uk

Success stories

“I hired Wendy to help me get through a stressful time of transition, during which I was moving house, buying a business and organising a community event, whilst also working eleven hour days. Thanks to her I’ve been able to break down the mountain that lay ahead of me, into chunks small enough to see over!

She has helped me to structure and focus each task so that each seems less daunting, and it feels like there’s momentum instead of an uphill struggle. I’m still working with Wendy, and so far despite the stresses I’m still sane, and actually enjoying the process. I’d recommend her to anyone else who feels like there aren’t enough hours in the day. Dr Michael Cassidy-Hogg DC” March 1, 2010

Top qualities: Good Value, High Integrity, Creative

Check out my review of Breaking Barriers Coaching – I am bblc – on Qype

Success planning

Seeing your goal and objective in a single picture is an extremely useful tool and exercise in planning for Success!

1. Start from the top with your ultimate goal – look at an example CLICK.

2. Visualise how you are going to achieve this goal, ask yourself “what will I need to do” and write your objective in the below level of the plan.

3. Use colours to breakdown each set of objectives.

4. Always connect using arrows moving upwards so you can see that you need to complete the first objective before moving forward.

5. To check that your success planning flows in a logical progression. Start from the bottom and ask “why am I doing this” you are aiming to obtain the objective above.

Think SMART!

* Keep your success plan handy.

* Plan your tasks for the coming month in advance weekly.

* Don’t make your plan over complicated.

* Celebrate your achievements.

* Take action every week that’ll move you one step closer to achieving each objective.

Business plans DON’T have to be complicated

Over the last couple of days I’ve carried out some research online. The level of Information regarding business plans is quite overwhelming and enough to put anybody off from even thinking of starting.

Business plans however do not need to be complicated.

A business plan is about setting short or mid-term goals and defining the steps necessary to achieve them. Under specific headings that are relevant to your business which will include the marketing plan, finances, sales, staffing, administration, systems and operations etc.

Take a minute to think about where you would like your busi-ness to be in three years?

• What will you need to have achieved in the first second and third year.
• Set out your ideas/business objectives under each heading.
• List all the actions you will need to take
• Think about your first step and start “taking action”.

Note ~ If setting long-term goals is not for you think about a goal you would need to have achieved within three months which will move you forward. Taking you in the direction of the vision of your business.

Then break this down into smaller steps and start  “taking action”.

For example: I will have delivered 3 x 10 minutes coaching presentations to women’s groups by 30th June 2010

Brainstorming ~  Identify women’s groups, pick the top five, identify who I need to talk to, put presentation together, plan ahead set dates in diary, promotional martial, blog, facebook, twitter strategy etc.

My first action ~ research online women’s groups in and around Brighton on Tuesday 9th Feb @ 1pm and set up a Excel data base.

Set your goals using the SMART framework

Specific ~ clear and well defined

Measurable ~  what will this give you

Achievable ~ is it possible

Realistic ~ is it what you really want

Timely ~ dates and times

Use your business plan as a working document  – don’t just put it in a filing cabinet.

• Save it to your desktop
• Put diary reminders on your calendar to look at it every month for review.

As you and your business develops make any necessary changes.

Top 10 tips for great goal setting

1. Start with the end in mind…

2. Your goal must be for yourself not somebody else…

3. Use a theoretical framework that works  – SMART goal setting…

4. Break your goal down into small steps – a plan for three months at a time…

5. Write your goal down, look at it regularly – add it to your Outlook calendar as a reminder…

6. Take some action every week no matter how small…

7. Make it fun…

8. Reward yourself…

9. Get support and advice when confronting the things that hold you back…

10. Set your goals in line with your core values…

Time Management Tips

Effective planning requires multiple levels of action, plan each day, week project and goal. Have a plan acknowledge that you will change it have it so you have the basis to start with. You can only change your plan if you have one!

Tip 1, When planning for the forthcoming week, block out a re occurring appointment.

Tip 2, Colour code your appointments.

Tip 3, Reduced your to-do list by breaking it down and scheduling action steps into your calendar.

Tip 4, *Schedule an appointment in your diary where you plan nothing, use this space to allow yourself time to think properly. This will enable you to pick up on urgent tasks and clean up projects.

Tip 5, Set a specific time for returning phone calls and responding to e-mails.

Notes, *Schedule your appointments as if you’re having a meeting

How to respond to negative comments onli

How to respond to negative comments online http://ow.ly/2KeLI

#Brighton TweetUp this week, come and me

#Brighton TweetUp this week, come and meet some really great people don’t miss out! http://ow.ly/2GHHc #btntwtup

Calling all female solo business owners

Calling all female solo business owners and entrepreneurs – A new #Mastermind group is about to start http://ow.ly/2GGMq

What What Women Think of Men On The Golf

What What Women Think of Men On The Golf Course Think of Men On The Golf Course

Are you thinking of becoming a life coach?

If you are thinking of qualifying as a life coach I would recommend reading Liz Scott’s blog from Coaching Connect first.

Life coaching courses link

Hello world!

The Tipping Point by Malcolm Gladwell is all about how information is passed. I woke up one morning about three weeks ago and thought to myself. How could I try this experiment on twitter, what I mean is how could I bring together a group of people who have a common interest by purely using a modern form of communication.

So I thought to myself twitter is the perfect modern-day tool for spreading information like a virus. So off I went on Twitter I sent direct messages to everybody I knew in Brighton inviting them to a social Meetup of like-minded tweeters.

Before my eyes I watched my new exciting venture take of. Now it’s one thing watching activity on Twitter but what people really turn up for a social gathering.

I’m delighted to say that the Brighton Twitter Social Meetup on the 28th May was a tremendous success! Over 30 Twitters from the local community arrived from a broad range of backgrounds which included individuals, entrepreneurs, businesses representatives and sole traders with a mix from the mainstream business world and creative industries.

New contacts were made and business passed.

Due to it’s success regular Meetups are now planned for the last Friday of each month between 4pm and 7pm venue to be confirmed.

Alternatively join the community on Facebook

or LinkedIn